By Junaid Tahir
While reading a book about raising kids I started making the list of unethical behavioural demonstrations which the children should be taught about and prevented right from their childhood. Later I thought that it's not only kids who are required to be taught such teachings but the adults too are essentially required to clean their mental engines which are having a lot of garbage and was never cleaned since ages.My friend, it's very logical that you take home cleaning matter very seriously. You clean the cupboards, home corners, lounge, kitchens and drawers with a lot of attention and care so that no dust or impurities are left which might cause health issues or cause you disrespect in front of your guests however you don't care about cleaning your inner selves. As a matter of fact you can rely on others to clean your home but you cannot depend on others to cleanse you. Its only you, yes only you who can clean the garbage in your brain, heart and soul.
Well, after I made my list, I started searching for the baseline definitions and advices against each immoral act and I was able to compile the below table.
By the way, a very important thing I noticed that most of the behaviours like anger, back biting, bad mouthing, brawls, cursing, lying and calling by names happen because people do not have strong control on what they speak hence let me say that tongue is the king because it is responsible for your outlook no matter how good you are at heart. A lot of problems and complications can be avoided only if people start thinking on what to speak, where to speak and how to speak. Anyways, below is the list and the details I compiled:
| Ethic | Reference |
| Anger | Allah's Apostle Peace Be Upon Him said, "The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger." Words once spoken cannot be taken back. Anger causes Long term impact on relationships. When you are in anger, your tongue works faster than brain which puts you on high risk of doing mistakes. This is why Islam forbids anger. |
back Biting | "…nor let some of you backbite others. Does one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? But you abhor it…" (Surah Hujurat 49: 12)" When you back bite you are on the risk of spreading false information and eventually you would be in bad books of others. The bad words spoken have a ripple effect because they will get spreaded in society very quickly hence the respect of a person gets converted to insult which is very big sin. |
Bad mouthing | Risk of losing respect and friends. People would prefer not to talk to you and would stay away from you. Read this story |
Beating | A heinous ethical crime whether the object is your kids or any other society member. Read this story |
Brawls | The Prophet said, "The most hated person in the sight of Allah is the most quarrelsome person." Volume 3, Book 43, Number 637 (Bukhari) |
Bribery | The Prophet (peace be on him) said, "Allah's curse is on the one who offers the bribe and on the judge who accepts it." (Reported by Ahmad, al-Tirmidhi, and Ibn Hibban in his Sahih.) |
Calling by Names | "and do not defame one another by using bad names. How bad it is after having true faith that a person (does these acts) but does not turn in repentance (to Allah) so then surely it is these people who are the oppressors" |
Carelessness | The Prophet said, "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your wards. The ruler is a guardian and the man is a guardian of his family; the lady is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your wards." Volume 7, Book 62, Number 128 Bukhari |
Cruelty | I heard the Prophet saying, "Shall I tell you of the people of Paradise? They comprise every poor humble person, and if he swears by Allah to do something, Allah will fulfill it; while the people of the fire comprise every violent, cruel arrogant person." Volume 8, Book 78, Number 651 Bukhari |
Cursing | The Prophet was not one who would abuse (others) or say obscene words, or curse (others), and if he wanted to admonish anyone of us, he used to say: "What is wrong with him, his forehead be dusted!" Volume 8, Book 73, Number 58 "O women! Give alms, as I have seen that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-fire were you (women)." They asked, "Why is it so, O Allah's Apostle ?" He replied, "You curse frequently and are ungrateful to your husbands. Volume 1, Book 6, Number 301 Bukhari |
Extravagancy | "Allah has hated for you three things: 1. Vain talks, (useless talk) that you talk too much or about others. 2. Wasting of wealth (by extravagance) 3. And asking too many questions (in disputed religious matters) or asking others for something (except in great need). Volume 2, Book 24, Number 555 Bukhari |
Gambling | "Whoever swears saying in his oath. 'By Al-Lat and Al'Uzza,' should say, 'None has the right to be worshipped but Allah; and whoever says to his friend, 'Come, let me gamble with you,' should give something in charity." Volume 8, Book 78, Number 645 Bukhari |
| Jealousy | "Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look for the others' faults and do not spy, and do not be Jealous of one another, and do not desert (cut your relation with) one another, and do not hate one another; and O Allah's worshipers! Be brothers (as Allah has ordered you!") - Volume 8, Book 73, Number 90 Bukhari |
Misery | Every day two angels come down from Heaven and one of them says, 'O Allah! Compensate every person who spends in Your Cause,' and the other (angel) says, 'O Allah! Destroy every miser.' " Volume 2, Book 24, Number 522 Bukhari |
Spying | Allah's Apostle said, 'Beware of suspicion, for it is the worst of false tales and don't look for the other's faults and don't spy and don't hate each other, and don't desert (cut your relations with) one another O Allah's slaves, be brothers!" Volume 8, Book 80, Number 717 Bukhari |
Suspecion | "Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look for the others' faults and do not spy, and do not be Jealous of one another, and do not desert (cut your relation with) one another, and do not hate one another; and O Allah's worshipers! Be brothers (as Allah has ordered you!") - Volume 8, Book 73, Number 90 Bukhari |
Telling Lies | The Prophet said, "Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to Paradise. And a man keeps on telling the truth until he becomes a truthful person. Falsehood leads to Al-Fajur (i.e. wickedness, evil-doing), and Al-Fajur (wickedness) leads to the (Hell) Fire, and a man may keep on telling lies till he is written before Allah, a liar." Volume 8, Book 73, Number 116 Bukhari |
Once again, I urge all of the readers to have solid control on your tongue and apply Socrates principal for all their communication needs.
Some associated articles:
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